Go M.A.D.

Pornography: 4 "B's" to Break Free

• Doug and Brad Hutchcraft • Season 4 • Episode 11

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In today's episode, the bros tackle one of the podcast's toughest topics yet: pornography. Countless followers of Jesus find themselves trapped in a never-ending cycle of shame with no hope on the horizon. Doug and Brad help us get a clear picture of God's grace for us and walk us through four keys to help us break free of porn's clutches. Let's go M.A.D.!


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Brad:

Hey there, everyone. Welcome back to Go Mad with Doug and Brad and Jesse Welcome.

Doug:

So for this episode we, as much as we love, I get this mental picture of you know how the kids all gather around and the adults the radio, like to listen to.

Speaker 3:

Little Orphan Annie back in the day.

Doug:

I don't know why, but for some reason that's how I get the mental picture of people listening to the podcast.

Brad:

I think that's how most listen to this.

Doug:

For sure. We're just going to say this, that this one is kind of rated, I don't know. Pg.

Brad:

Maybe, 13. Maybe 13.

Doug:

We're talking about um porn how to break free from it. So maybe if the kids are around and there's some brady bunch reruns going on in the other room, this might be a good time to introduce them to I don't know what generation you're living.

Brad:

You've got people sitting around the radio. You've got people watching.

Doug:

I jump from the 30s to the 70s.

Brad:

We get the idea, because you may be driving to school, drop your kids off at school right now. So it's just a whenever we talk about the topic of pornography. Yeah, this is. There are things the bible says, things that we're going to say, that just we want to make sure that we're going to have the grid for whether people should be listening with things that we're going to say.

Brad:

That just we want to make sure that you have the grid for whether people should be listening with you or not Exactly, we're going to be honest. I will say, if you this is a very important topic in our lives we're not going to just, you know, you're not going to walk away from here with us saying, hey, take these three steps and this will never be an issue, ever again in your life.

Brad:

But we are going to talk about kind of how we get into this issue but also how we can take steps towards freedom. So we're going to cover that. But as we're talking about this, as we're thinking about this, I actually had a memory hit me from our days living in arizona now doug you get desert.

Brad:

That's right you had moved away recently, um and um, after being out in this community for over 12 years you had been out there and we move in, uh, to this place out there and it's just a place we're renting him we start start noticing over the years that there are these little critters that we're starting to share our space with, not voluntarily.

Doug:

Brad, they're called rattlesnakes. No, not them, not them.

Brad:

Sorry, it's just mice. It's mice running around.

Speaker 3:

Oh yeah, now when you're in the Southwest.

Brad:

Obviously you see mice and people are like they have hantavirus and you're like I don't want mice in my house. I just don't want them in the house, just in general. So, there they are, and it starts with a couple and it's like okay, so we're putting out the glue traps, we're putting out the mousetraps, all this.

Doug:

Those were great. Well they worked at first.

Brad:

They worked at first first and and so we're like, okay, we're staying on top of this. And then we start noticing this is a disturbing moment in your life where you get a glue trap. You go out to it in the morning and there's just fur left on it and you're like.

Speaker 3:

Not only do these not work, they are they are out.

Brad:

They are smarter and stronger. These are super mice.

Doug:

They're just like and and, so we thought you were gonna say if they're like eating Cheerios next to you, they have gained confidence that was next.

Brad:

So Sarah and I noticed that in this house, in the kitchen, we start losing drawers because they're like in the lowest drawer.

Doug:

They were stealing their drawers.

Brad:

We're just closing.

Speaker 3:

How big are these things? We're basically sealing off drawers because we're giving up.

Brad:

The traps aren't working, the peanut butter's not working, cheese isn't working, oh no, so we're basically giving up parts of the house to these little critters, to these things that are, these invasive things finally, after a few years of this well in case there's anyone that is just like, hey, just catch them in your hands and set them free outside. That's not our. Uh, they, we found traps that really were. Let me just say they really work, yeah, and finally found something that was effective.

Brad:

When I think of the issue of pornography, that is what it seems like to me that in the issue of pornography, that is what it seems like to me that in the lives of people, that when we deal with this, it's like this thing that starts coming in and it's like, oh well, it's just a little bit, it's just this, it's just that. And then, all of a sudden, it takes over more and more of our lives and we're just searching for how do I deal with this? I've tried this, I've tried that and we don't know what to do with it. But then, all of a sudden, someone steps in and says hey, you know what? I've had this problem and I know that there can be freedom from it and you start giving helps to someone else.

Brad:

That's what we're talking about today. This conversation isn't about judgment or shame and, as I said before, we can't say, hey, just take these three steps and everything's fine. But we can say take these three steps and you're on the road to freedom, so we can talk about the roots of kind of where pornography starts to come into our lives and at least some of these steps you or a loved one can take. Let me tell you this If you're sitting here listening saying I don't deal with this, praise God first of all.

Doug:

Seriously. Yeah, you're in the minority if you've never had to deal with it.

Brad:

But you know someone who does. Whether you know you know someone who does. You know someone who does. So please listen in, share this with friends and family. We pray that this will be a good, healthy, encouraging conversation for you today.

Doug:

Yeah, and thanks, brad. The podcast is about ambassadorship. Yeah, being an ambassador, being Christ's representative to others, the longer maybe you've dealt with this problem, maybe it's an addiction in your life or someone you know and, like you said, brad, it comes in so quickly and you don't realize how much of a hold it's taking and it affects as an ambassador, affects every relationship in your life. The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy your life. Uh, the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy, and the longer you've dealt with pornography, the more you know this is one of his big ones, this is one of his big weapons to do that. We know, if you're listening that, um, you probably already come in feeling, feeling shame, um, feeling guilt about it, or maybe you haven't been able to help a friend with it.

Brad:

Maybe you feel hopeless. Maybe you feel, oh man, Because it's just going on so long.

Doug:

Yes, you know you ask yourself why is it so difficult to escape? I was looking into this a few years ago when I was preparing a message, and it turns out this is like. You know how much I hate to get into science because I really don't understand any of it, but I got, I understood this. So pornography watching it, it is as addictive as a strong drug like cocaine or morphine. There's a book out there called your Brain on Porn how Porn Hijacks the Male Brain and it can hijack the female brain too, of course. But it talks about this study with these cardboard butterflies. Now let me read this to you, because this is fascinating and it really than the average live butterfly. So you got these cardboard ones that are made more colorful, gorgeous than the average butterfly. Now let me read this to you. Then butterflies would seek out the cardboard butterfly to mate with, rather than the real butterfly.

Doug:

It goes on to say when you're exposed to pornography on the screen and images come up that are highly stimulating and arousing, it's like the cardboard butterfly. It goes on to say when you're exposed to pornography on the screen and images come up that are highly stimulating and arousing, it's like the cardboard butterfly your brain receives listen to this a flood of dopamine into your system and opioid types of transmitters which seemingly make you feel good because it's for pleasure. You're also receiving opioid pain, reducing neurotransmitters, which helps bond your brain to the screen. This keeps you coming back for more pornography. So, whatever sexual activity your brain is exposed to, it's adapting, it's brain training. Wow, whether it's pornography or real sex, in your mind it can't really tell the difference. So, as far as your mind is concerned get this you're having a sexual encounter with the person on the screen, as far as your mind is concerned.

Doug:

So now, perhaps your wife all of a sudden doesn't measure up and you don't even realize you're doing this to yourself. You go, where did my desire for my wife go? We're wired by God through sex to bond spiritually with our spouse, and I've heard it called a soul. Sex is a soul adhesive on purpose. God wired us that way. So you don't just watch a sex scene. You just, according to this science, super glued yourself to a stranger and, in the process, maybe unglued yourself from your spouse and that's really uh.

Brad:

Where we have to start with the topic is talking about the monster under the bed. We have to talk about this monster, pornography, because it's not, again, not for guilt and shame, it's to acknowledge what it is, and what you just shared there goes a long way to establish the dangers of it. I honestly, going into this, there's a big Barna study that was about pornography years ago and now they did a second one just in the last year, beyond pornography and talks more about it, and I honestly thought that this was a topic just as far as what is pornography. That was agreed upon. I kind of thought that, especially with Christians, that it was hey, we agree at least on what the base is that we're talking about, but it's not. There's not agreement even on what it is, I think sometimes because we're rationalizing what it is. So let's take a look at this Because of what you just said, doug Pornography the word isn't in the Bible.

Brad:

If you're looking for that, it's not in the Bible. But the idea is and that's what you were just talking about there that the root word of it is porneia. The root word of pornography is porneia is in the Bible, it's repeated several times and it basically means sexual immorality. And so, while we have wanted to kind of isolate this sin, that is just hey, it's just me, it's just one person. It's a really kind of a victimless sin other than myself, because it's just, it's not, you know, having an affair with someone else or whatever else.

Brad:

It's sexual immorality. It's not a victimless sin, it is a. It is something that impacts people around us, it impacts you, it impacts, I mean, the people on the screen that we are seeing, when we see that they are victims. They are victims because it is something that people want to see. And so the definition I saw on this is pornography, and the definition is so kind of sterile. It's printed or visual material that contains the description or depiction of erotic or sexual activity. For me it's, it's messier than that, it's not I. I mean it is when we see someone or we're reading something that is sexual in nature and it gets our body feeling any sort of way that only our spouse is supposed to get us feeling.

Brad:

Even if we never act on those feelings. You're dealing with some sort of pornography there, and it's hard when we look at it that way. But let's be real about it. We've got to drag that monster out into the light. Oh yeah, because that's when you can really start to deal with it and start to find freedom and healing in all of this. Um, jesse, we're going to be talking about four b's today yes um, we kind of get to the first one.

Brad:

We're talking about the monster under the bed and dealing with what pornography really is.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, yeah, and Doug had mentioned I put it a really good way earlier we start with brokenness. We start with where we're really at, two kinds of brokenness. First is recognizing the tragedy of the sin that we find ourselves in. Most people, I think, don't get into pornography on their 18th birthday. Having made a calculated decision, I think this is a good career move.

Speaker 3:

Most people who find themselves trapped in pornography today that started as a child. That's a tragedy that should not have happened In multiple facets. They should not have been allowed access to that kind of material material. It's a tragedy that we live in a world that targets children. As a viewer, as an 8, 10, 12-year-old, if you're handed a stick of dynamite, you don't know what to do with it. And in some degree, unless we recognize as an adult what a tragedy it was that that child had to handle something so explosive at that age, maybe without any guidance, maybe in secret. That is so sad and it never should have been. And it's evidence of the fallen world that we're in. We're living in a world where sin just thrives. Sin just thrives and sadly the weak and the young often receive the brunt of what sin does to this world. And as an adult, we have to recognize that if we find ourselves in pornography now, what a tragedy.

Speaker 3:

And if we allow ourselves to feel that brokenness, we can bring that brokenness to God and say, oh, my goodness, wasn't that God. We can cry out with the psalmist like God, this is awful. We can lament, we can cry over the fact that we had to endure that. Now the other side of brokenness is every time I look at pornography, it's offensive to God. And so I look at my part to play and say, okay, what am I doing now If I look at pornography? Because God is so good and because he values his image bearers so much that when I look at pornography I am devaluing his creation, his image bearers, and I have to reckon with that. I have to admit that and I bring that side of my brokenness to God. So, god, on one hand, what a tragedy that I live in this world and maybe had to deal with this at a young age. On the other side, what an offense to God that I'm dishonoring his creation. Bringing those two sides of brokenness to God is a great place to start for our hearts.

Doug:

It's powerful.

Doug:

Kids finding this stuff. You know it used to be that you had to go and if you wanted to view this stuff you had to go and find it. You had to go to a store, a video, a magazine or something, it doesn't matter. You don't have to find pornography anymore. Pornography finds you and because of these, because of phones, it's so easy to access.

Doug:

And one of the great tragedies, as Jesse just said, is when a young person and these days really young. So, before you get too down on yourself and yes, there is a feeling of brokenness that comes from knowing you've sinned against God and you need to be made right. But know that a lot of times, man, you're victimized at a very young age. Like Jesse said, it was brokenness that got you into this mess, but it's going to be brokenness, a healthy kind, that gets you out.

Doug:

Psalm 51 says praise God for this. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, o God. So come to him like that. The same God that hates sin, ready for some good news, loves to restore hearts that love him. He says I make all things new. So if you are here, if you're listening today, going, I can't believe how many times I've told God I'm going to get away from this. I can't believe I haven't been able to help the person that needs help so badly. Start here that no matter how long it's been, no matter how many times you've made the promise, he still wants to make you new. He still wants to restore you. There's always a way out and he's got one for you. That's why I'm glad we're talking about these four Bs today. The first one brokenness.

Brad:

The things that we prepare for the podcasts, obviously, but sometimes you don't know exactly which direction something's gonna go. Um the, I want to. I want to share this, and then I want to share something personal. Um, in your brokenness, please know that you are not alone. The devil wants you to think, in your shame, in your regret, in your hopeless feeling that you have that you are alone. But today, these are some stats and then, like I said, I want to share something from my heart with you. Three in five adults 61% report viewing pornography, and half of those who use porn say that no one knows. So I mean, there's a good number of people who they just think no one knows. It's a huge problem that impacts countless more people than we'll ever really know. You can't tell when you just go look at someone or meet someone what sin they're dealing with.

Doug:

In a lot of cases and this is one of those the vast majority of people in this life, because of phones and everything, have been exposed to it at some point.

Brad:

Yeah, and the access, like you said, doug, is it's it feels unstoppable. Sometimes it just does. For every filter that's created, the devil works to defeat it with some unseen open door. That doesn't mean you don't use filters. Let me be clear there. Don't throw up your hands. I've seen people who just throw up their hands. It's like, well, filters don't work. Well, I mean, even if they don't work completely, if they work some, that's some protection. This checks out data from WebRoot Cybersecurity, so a firm that just looks at blank numbers here estimates that I really was floored by this and, honestly, it's heartbreaking when I read it.

Brad:

It's heartbreaking now 28,258 users are watching pornography every second and 35% of all internet downloads are related to pornography. But you are not alone, but the devil wants you to make you feel like you are and that you shouldn't talk about it. I know because I've been there and I'm going to be honest. Part of me is like, well, don't talk about it, brad. You need to talk about this from the outside, looking in as far as yes, I know this is a problem for other people. I have found freedom. I want you to know that and I am so grateful to God that he has given me a freedom and a newness of life in this area. It doesn't mean that there aren't temptations, so I want to be clear on that. But there's a freedom.

Brad:

I remember, jesse, as you were sharing, I remember it was a young age where it didn't become an addiction at a young age or whatever, but all of a sudden it was just a very random, unexpected, not sought after exposure to pornography and it was it's like when you look at pornography, it's it's like my dad uses this. You guys probably have heard this. I know you have Doug. He uses this illustration of me. He'll say my now key words here. He says what if my son, brad, was up in his room and he started a fire? And we have this fireplace in our house growing up and he's like, and he just decides to start this fire in his room and all of a sudden he's like, dad, that now I have to, I do have to tell you. People come up to me. They have come up to me and said you started a fire in your room and I'm like. He says what if? But if I'm being honest, there was a fire that I did allow to burn. That should have never been lit. Little flame.

Brad:

If you can grab that giant bucket of water from the Lord and douse that early on, it will save you months and years of heartache and you can help someone else in that. If you have walked this road and you found freedom, help someone else. Don't hide your story. Tell people. I'm not saying you have to put it on blast on the Internet, but you know, tell people who are struggling with it. If you are in the middle of it now, tell someone about it, because there is hope and there is freedom. And if you know someone that's young and just might be exposed to it, they're not going to come up to you and say hey, dad, guess what I just saw? That is they might, they might, but the odds are that they are going to feel ashamed about it. Well, there's so much shame involved and they're going to hide it and it gives the devil room to work.

Brad:

So just know you're not alone and there are steps we're going to get to really quick here but that you can take to start on the road to freedom or help someone else.

Doug:

No temptation has overtaken you, but such is common to man that scripture might not apply more to something than pornography. Brad, you brought this up and let's just go down this road a little bit more. We're talking about the four Bs. The first is brokenness. The next one is a brother or a sister or, as my wife says, or a bestie. So that would be a good B.

Doug:

Like you said, sin thrives in secrecy. I've said before that sin is a vampire. Maybe you don't watch vampire movies, but I know enough that when you drag it out into light, into sunlight, it dies. It dies in the light. Sin loves being secret. Drag it into the light by having accountability with somebody that you trust, a brother in Christ, a sister in Christ. You say, oh, that's so embarrassing. But this is God's prescription for healing In James 5.16, confess your sins, pray for each other, so you'll be healed.

Doug:

I love one of my favorite scriptures in all the Word 1 John 1.9. If we confess our sins, he's faithful and just. He won't just yes, he will forgive our sins, it says, but then he will purify us from all unrighteousness. Now I'm going to warn you your flesh, your sin, nature will hate you for this. It's going to say don't tell anybody. And if you're going to make sure it's someone you trust, maybe it's a pastor. And I would strongly suggest, if it's not going to be a spouse, that it's a person of the same sex, not the opposite sex.

Doug:

Your flesh or sin nature will say don't do it, but take this huge leap of humility and let me address this real quick here as the spouse, there may come a day where God works on your spouse's heart to come and confess this to you. Decide now rather than when you're in the shock of the moment. Decide now how you're going to respond to this. I will say this is such a huge act of love on your spouse's part to be willing to confess this and it's a huge act of love for your spouse as hearing it to forgive. But this is how God says we get to healing. How will you respond? Forgive, as Christ has forgiven you. I know that's hard, but consider this If your spouse loves you enough to have the courage to tell you, love them enough to forgive them, and make that decision now, before the shot kicks in.

Brad:

I didn't know you were going to share that thought with folks. And that is so important because you and I have seen we've talked with people who the spouse we know, and there's studies this Barna survey, there's studies on that how it impacts the other person. And it's not just women struggle with this too. Let's be clear. More and more women struggle with the issue of pornography. No question, doug, as you say, spouse, let's not. I think people's minds go to the husband is telling his wife he's been struggling. It could go the other way as well. It is.

Brad:

We've heard spouses react out of anger, out of disgust, out of all these things, and I get the feelings, I get those emotions. We're not negating those, shortchanging those, but this survey says 84%, 74% even for Christians. So 84% for people overall, 74% of Christians say they don't have someone in their life helping them with the issue of pornography. Talk about feeling alone. So if they are reaching out and saying, hey, I know I have broken Hebrews 13 and I have not kept the marriage bed pure and this is how that's played out, I've been looking at things I shouldn't look at or however they phrase that Help them know that you're there to work through it with them, not that you're okay with it, not that you have to be like, oh, that's fine, let's just move forward, but that you're willing to work through it. And I would go to one other group with that, doug the parents out there when when things, when things were discovered.

Brad:

As far as the struggles I was having, you know what I still remember that a father who didn't react out of anger or disappointment or shame.

Brad:

Oh, praise God. But basically had his arms around me saying, hey, we're I don't know his exact words, but we're going to get through this. I'm here to help you through this. It made a world of difference because it was something I was so afraid of. And then to have someone there that said I'm here to walk through this with you. And so what you said, doug, about someone you trust, that's really key, because you don't want someone that's going to react the wrong way. You want someone that's going to say you know what, whether I've experienced it or not, I'm here to walk through this with you and help you find the healing that you want.

Doug:

Just wow. Here's the thing. When you say that, I'm thinking of the person. First of all, thank you for being honest and sharing what you're sharing, because there's someone, more than one, that is listening, thinking that it's hopeless to get out of this. When someone reaches out to you with this, reach back to them, don't recoil in horror. I'm thinking of our Heavenly Father. We think, if I come to Him with this, he's so angry with me about my sin. We think, if I come to him with this, he's so angry with me about my sin. He's just waiting. He's sitting on a cloud just waiting to stomp me because of how angry he is with me. Remember, remember, he is faithful and just. You come to him with this. Just like our dad was a representation of our heavenly father, he will feel the same way. He will feel love and he will. He will be glad that you come and say I want to. I want this out of my life brokenness, um, a brother or or a bestie and and in the brother.

Brad:

Let me give I, I do want to say two hope verses um oh good, we need those stuck out to me in my life with this.

Brad:

First of all, because you said there is hope and there is 1 Corinthians 10.13,. No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind, and God is faithful. He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. There's hope because God gets what you're going through. He knows the feelings. He knows what temptation is because of Jesus, because he knows these feelings and he created us. He knows our inmost being, but he's faithful. He's not going to let us be tempted. Even if we give in to temptation, it doesn't mean God didn't provide a way out. It just means we missed the off-ramp. We weren't looking for it, maybe, but this is the other one. This is the you were.

Brad:

Verse 1 Corinthians 6, 9. It talks about the sexually immoral. Then you look at but you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. And it says in verse 11 of 1 Corinthians 6, 1 Corinthians 6, 11, that is what some of you were. You were washed, you were sanctified, you were this. You don't have to be defined by that anymore. It's not who you are. You can put it in the were category oh man and praise God for that.

Doug:

Yeah, man, we've got a brother. We got brokenness. We start with brokenness before the Lord A brother. I heard a story recently, a true story, about a guy, a father, who found his son's porn stash, basically a bunch of magazines. His son had hidden them in the laundry room and somewhere I don't I'm not sure where, but somewhere in the laundry room and his. So his dad is looking for something. Of course he finds these. He didn't confront his son about it, didn't confront his son about it. He didn't even say a word to him. You know what he did? He left him there, but he left the Bible on top. Oh, wow, wow, of the stash.

Doug:

Wow, there's only one weapon that kills strongholds and that is truth. It's God's truth. That's why it says in 2 Corinthians we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. God's book, the Bible. There's our third B is that weapon we're not talking about? Oh, go read the Bible and everything will be okay. We're talking about that. The Word of God is alive and active, separates truth from lies and it can make the difference in your heart. I can tell you this this is truth. This book is that weapon. Commit to regular Bible study, memorization and and prayer through certain scriptures that are truths about our bodies, that are truth about lies, and in Romans it says that the mind will be transformed and will be renewed. He renews our hearts, he renews our minds. You can drain your brain of the drunk and we talked about brain training before.

Doug:

You can retrain your brain amen for a holiness, proverbs 25, like a city whose walls are broken through. As a person who lacks self-control, um, do you know the opposite of porneia is? I mean, you brought up greek before I did, mr smarty pants.

Doug:

That's mostly why I did I gotta, I, I, I gotta, at least try here. But actually the opposite of porneia is this word encrateia. It means self-control, ooh. The opposite of porneia is self-control, discipline. Here's the thing that verse goes on to say about whose walls are broken down. So a city with no walls means the enemy is getting in wherever he wants. The word builds the walls against that attack. By the way, we might be surprised all the Bible has to say about sex and people. Just a little side note here we gave a PG-13 rating earlier.

Brad:

Oh man, I don't know if there is a rating. We're way beyond this.

Doug:

I don't know if there is a rating, but that's the thing. Yeah, porn is bad. The Lord made sex. It's this incredible expression of love in marriage. It's why we got to get serious about getting it out of the picture.

Brad:

So, Brad, we've had— I got to jump in here because you mentioned Bible, so here's just a verse that sticks out to me from the Bible, because so many times when I hear people talk about leaving this stuff behind, it's about get rid of it. Stop, stop, stop, stop. And I love this verse that Paul's writing to a young Timothy, who may have had feelings and desires.

Doug:

He's like every other young man.

Brad:

And he says Paul writes to him flee the evil desires of youth. 2 Timothy 2.22. But he doesn't just leave it at flee the evil desires of youth. He gives them the other part of it Pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart. So don't just leave this vacuum of flee, flee, flee it's also pursue. And that's where the word of God comes in, doug, that's where it helps give us this light for our path. So lean into that truth and as you pursue you will retrain your mind because you are pursuing the things of the Lord. So I love that, doug. It's God's promise.

Doug:

So we've got the brokenness that leads to the brother, the brother, the Bible. Have you ever seen? Here's our fourth B to break free. Perhaps you ever see those movies where it's at the end and the guy who's the bad guy, the murderer or whatever the good guy kind of gets a hit in, like he hits him and he's like and the murderer is kind of stunned and he's like oh, now what should you do next? Take another swing right, make sure that this guy is taken care of so he can't attack you. But instead he doesn't do anything. He doesn't do anything and you're like, you're yelling at the screen he's not dead, you idiot. He's not dead. Don't be that guy.

Doug:

Like you said, brad, god always uses he uses terms many times of like total annihilation when it comes to sin in a believer's life Put to death, kill, destroy. So that's why our fourth B is a bat. I'm talking like a baseball bat, basically what we're saying here. Look, you go into Acts and you see the early believers. They found how much God hated witchcraft and they had all these very valuable books and scrolls, said it was worth millions of dollars in today's money. They said, well, I think we'll go put them in a drawer and make sure we don't look anymore. Now actually they have a public bonfire, they go. We're going to make sure there's not a way back to this thing that has hurt us. That offends God they decided we're not. Offends God, they decided we're not. Something we do is we keep feeding this monster, just these little morsels, rather than just taking a bat and killing it, getting it out of our life.

Brad:

Victoria's Secret catalogs that app on your phone.

Speaker 3:

It could be, a social media thing, that you're scrolling.

Doug:

It's everywhere. I'm going to delete that NFL commercials. I mean, ask David, ask King David, what kind of damage just a little spicy entertainment can do. That, of course, started a domino effect, one that started with compromise I can handle it and it blows up into something awful. So 2 Corinthians 7, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates. And boy, just pour into that.

Brad:

Well, and you said before Doug, put to death. I actually I had that verse written down here. Colossians 3, 5 says put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil, desires and greed, which is idolatry. So you have in there sexual immorality, impurity and lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. So you have in there sexual immorality, impurity and lust and evil. I mean you have all these different things that could tie into pornography.

Brad:

But when we're looking at this in the sexual immorality side, it really starts with that determination as well. It's not just an idea, that a thought, well, I really should not do this anymore. It's a determination I'm gonna put this to death, I'm gonna do what it takes and I'm gonna leave this thing behind. And I'm gonna leave it, like you said, not turn my back on it when it's there's a uh. There's a scene in, uh, this movie, monty python years ago, where they, they're this guy, they think he's dead and he's like I'm not dead yet and uh, and it's. That's what. If you leave it there, it is a chance to come back to life put it to death.

Doug:

We keep feeding the monster in our closet, these little morsels, because we're not okay. So get. I'm going to tell you just real quick, a couple of true stories, true things that people have done. Guys, I know what they have done to get serious about this. And then ask yourself, if you're listening, what do I need to do to get serious about this? One guy I know look, I'm just telling you, you decide.

Brad:

He's shot, be careful. We're not saying go do this right now.

Doug:

We're telling you what others have done, decide what it is for you to get serious about it. One guy put his iPhone on a tree and shot an arrow through it. He said it's not worth it. It's not worth it. One guy taped pictures. Get this.

Brad:

Finish the episode before you do that.

Doug:

And then another guy taped pictures of grandmother, grandfather, great-grandmother, because he wanted to be remembered that there's a cloud of witnesses around him. I haven't heard that one Another guy took a picture of Jesus on the cross and put it on his computer screen. Wow, Maybe you need to use a medicine ball instead of going to the gym. You know what I did so way back. So I used to get this magazine when there was such a thing as paper magazines. Yeah, I've seen those before.

Doug:

Called Entertainment Weekly. Yeah, and I asked Anna. I said would you go through this please? Would you go through this please and just get rid of anything that you think would be offensive to God? I don't want it to harm my relationship with you and it was so funny when I got this thing back. There's just rips and tears and marker things. There's 10% of this thing left. Do whatever it takes. And, by the way, if we're talking about bridges, remember our kids. There's a reason in 2 Timothy it talks about fleeing youthful lusts because it starts then. Your 10-year-old is looking for ways to thumb through that SI swimsuit issue. They're watching super sexualized movies, tv shows with tons of that humor. Listen, when you're cool with those things, you might as well be handing him or her that stuff to look at. Don't feel the flames of a future addiction by not being a leader for purity in your home and I think that kind of, at least for me.

Brad:

this is how I would round it out for me, how I'd wrap some things up with these. The encouraging news, as we've been talking about, that there is a way out, that the Lord can use your brokenness. If you just acknowledge that before him and you give that to him, he can use the tools of a brother, a Bible, a bat in your life to be able to be free from this. So my encouragement is when you look at 1 Corinthians, 10, 13, that we said before, when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out. Use the tools that are a way out.

Brad:

So that means stop watching some of the things you watch that have portray women inappropriately or men inappropriately or relationships inappropriately. Some of these innocuous as I don't think we could say chick flicks anymore, but I those innocuous rom-coms, that's it Now I then you that some of those stories in there are very detrimental because all of a sudden you have this one night stand and it's like it's fine and all these things and it triggers different feelings in different people. But use things like covenant eyes. It's a. It's so funny because I've talked with people.

Brad:

Covenant Eyes is something where basically someone in your life that you designate, that you trust, gets a report on what you've been looking at, what you've been doing and everything. This is huge, it works, and to know that accountability is there. I've heard people say, well, yeah, but Covenant Eyes can be a little pricey, I'm like. So we're putting a price now on the and it's not bad.

Doug:

What's pricey is not getting rid of this addiction. Exactly so if you need that.

Brad:

Do that. Use the filters for your home. There's apps out there like Custodio. Yeah.

Doug:

Jesse, what was that one? You mentioned one recently.

Speaker 3:

Oh Canopy yeah, canopy, I've been looking at that actually recently what?

Doug:

does it do?

Speaker 3:

I remember thinking that's incredible. It real-time blocks sexually explicit images whatever's on the screen. So it doesn't. I think. If I understand right, it doesn't go by site.

Doug:

It goes by what's showing up on the screen.

Brad:

Yeah, and I do think that one is especially targeted towards sexually explicit content is especially targeted towards sexually explicit content, so that one. So there's so many tools out there. Even if they don't catch everything, they can be part of the plan that God uses. Be proactive.

Brad:

Lean into as you said before someone you trust, a brother or sister in Christ, if you're same-sex, especially outside of marriage, and then if you are sharing this with your spouse, to be able to do it in a way that is a healthy way. If you missed that earlier on, go back, listen to that. And Galatians 5.1 is the verse that I want people to be encouraged with today. It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves I love that mindset Do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery, because we're fighting back, we're standing firm, we're fighting back.

Brad:

Galatians 5.1. Galatians 5.1.

Doug:

Wow that's good.

Brad:

There is freedom. Christ has given us that, and I think the one image that hits me is when we talk about not being alone. Having someone to walk through this with you is so key. You have your Savior that you should go to that, you should talk to about this. And then you have that brother or sister in Christ, and I think of Mr Frodo and Sam Gamjis that are Lord of the Rings, and I don't can I give a spoiler alert. When something's been out that long, at the very end, you see that Frodo can't keep doing, he can't fight on his own, he can't keep going. And Sam picks him up and he says I can't do this for you, but I can carry you. And he says I am going to be there for you. Be that brother in Christ for someone, and if you are struggling with yourself, let someone carry you in those hard times.

Doug:

Boy. There's so much that God has to say about this. We're going to wrap up here in a second, but, jesse, if you would, in a moment, we're just going to pray for whoever's listening that is heartbroken because they are trapped in this and they feel like there's not a way out. Or someone they love very much is trapped in it and they don't feel like there's a way out. Oswald Chambers listen to this quote. This is amazing. Oswald Chambers said this leave the irreversible past in God's hands and step out into the invincible future with him. Is anyone else ready for that? He is a God that restores. He can make it where you only have eyes for each other.

Doug:

Again, you may have been listening today feeling dirty. God says let me clean you up. Come to me Feeling shame. God says let me forgive you. Come to me Enslaved. God says come to me, I'll make you free. That freedom starts at the cross of Jesus Christ, acts 3.19,. And then, jesse, if you'd pray for us and for everyone listening here, do this. Repent then and turn to God so that your sins may be wiped out, and praise God for this that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.

Speaker 3:

Let's pray. Father, we're coming to you recognizing we can't actually change our own hearts. You can, that's right. We're recognizing we don't have power to walk in obedience to you. You can help us do that. We're coming to you because we need you, thank you that you offer us forgiveness every single day, and we need it every single day, but we want to walk in a way that honors you. We have you in our hearts. We're your ambassadors, jesus, we want to do a good job at that. We need so much help.

Speaker 3:

Would you come even now and begin to work in hearts of listeners to set them free, to enable them to walk in a way that honors you, in openness and freedom, knowing that as they bring their sin to you, they will not be rejected, but they will be received like the father receives the prodigal son. Help them to believe it. That's what you're really like, holy Spirit. Do the work in us that we can't do. Help us, though, to take the steps that we can take, trusting that it's you who works in us as we work out our salvation with fear and trembling. We love you in Jesus' name, amen.

Brad:

As you take these steps to freedom, as you walk towards this, you will become a more effective ambassador for your Savior, for Jesus.

Doug:

So until next time, from all of us to all of you go MAD.